Hello hello, and welcome to Episode 108 of Life On the Brink!
This is the time of year when a sunny day versus a cloudy day can make all the difference; it’s that part of winter where I start to really crave springtime. It’s just around the corner, soon! But until then, even on the brink of a season change, I’ve been searching for ways to enjoy, embrace (or survive) the end of winter.
Personally, this pregnancy has kicked my emotions into high gear, and I find I’m more affected by the darkness and cold of winter than I ever have been before. I’ll be honest, January was a rough month, emotionally speaking, and I’ve been careful to be gentle with myself over the past few weeks. Even when I know what’s likely causing some dramatic emotional changes, it can still be hard to shake it, and I know many of you may be dealing with a similar sort of thing this winter. How can we shift our perspective or alter our environment to be gentler and warmer this winter?
What’s in my teacup? Plain black (decaf) tea with milk
Today’s episode is greatly inspired by Meik Wiking’s very popular book, “The Little Book of Hygge: Danish Secrets to Happy Living.”
I listened to the audiobook at the end of last year and bought a physical copy soon after. It’s not only beautiful just to look at, but is filled with insight into the Danish lifestyle and contains lots of actual research from the Happiness Research Institute in Copenhagen, which Wiking himself founded.
Throughout this episode I’m going to be sharing quotes and little tidbits from this book, along with some extra things that I have personally been enjoying throughout this winter.
WHAT IS HYGGE?
The Oxford Dictionary defines hygge as: “a quality of coziness and comfortable conviviality that engenders a feeling of contentment or well-being (regarded as a defining characteristic of Danish culture).”
Author Meik Wiking describes hygge in his own words in his book as well:
“Hygge is the antidote to the cold winter, the rainy days, and the duvet of
darkness. So while you can have hygge all year round, it is during winter that
it becomes not only a necessity but a survival strategy….
…Hygge is about an atmosphere and an experience, rather than about things.
It is about being with the people we love. A feeling of home. A feeling that
we are safe, that we are shielded from the world and allow ourselves to let
our guard down. You may be having an endless conversation about the small
or big things in life- or just be comfortable in each other’s silent company-
or simply just be by yourself enjoying a cup of tea.”
While the word doesn’t have a direct translation to English, it’s such an integral part of Danish living. There’s a cultural emphasis on coziness that includes candles, warm drinks, good friends, hearty food, simple furnishings, gratitude, equality, and safety all rolled into one! Today I’m drawing inspiration from this mindset and sharing some ways I’ve invited this “survival strategy”
Now, I’m not suggesting that lighting a candle will make everything better right away. By no means! I know we have stresses in our lives and sometimes there are bigger things going on (or perhaps like me, you’re feeling through all those pregnancy hormones). Rather, creating an overall ambience of comfort and safety, or perhaps a slower or less demanding rhythm, makes it easier for my mind to let go of the little stressors of the day and enjoy the present moment.
So with that, here’s a few ideas!
WAYS TO INVITE HYGGE INTO YOUR WINTER DAYS
-Make your bed/bedroom as cozy and warm as possible. In the book, Wiking describes the importance of a cozy spot as such:
“The one thing that every home needs is a hyggekrog, which roughly
translates as ‘a nook.’ It is the place in the room where you love to
snuggle up in a blanket, with a book and a cup of tea.”
Personally, I have been relishing my bed as a cozy place to begin the day. I have no regrets about investing in an excellent mattress and a soft duvet, they make me into the perfect cozy sandwich where I enjoy, just as in the above quote, a book and cup of tea.
-Enjoy the mornings. The morning is often my favorite time of day. It's often the sunniest and it's when I feel the most comforted and energized. Some days I'm up and active and getting things done, while others I spend relishing the slowness. Whatever it looks like, I've been much stricter about being on my phone in the mornings, and instead being intentional with my first few hours to really enjoy my time. It really sets up the mood for my whole day!
-Move, especially outside. The winter is lovely for walking outdoors because you won't overheat! Because of that (and my tendency to be slow during winter mornings) I've been walking more in the afternoon, just before the sun sets. That way, coming inside to my warm home feels cozy and inviting from the cold, rather than cloistering. Plus, exercise is good for the body and mind, and I always feel better for it.
-Delve into longer reads. What better time to get lost in a long, perhaps heavy book, than when you're at home with nowhere to go? Since I'm not adhering to a reading goal this year, I feel doubly free to read bigger books that take me longer to read. The long nights are made for such activities, and with a proper hyggekrog, it's lovely.
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Candles. Something I learned in this book is that Danes love candles and they burn A LOT of them. What's more, they're mostly unscented, it's just for the lighting. In fact, there's a whole chapter about lighting in this book, and there's nothing quite like firelight to add a hint of romance and elevation to a space. I've begun lighting tapered candles when I set the table for dinner, and I always enjoy a nice scented candle when reading or hosting or working at my desk. Instant hygge.
“When I give lectures about happiness research, I ask the audience to close their eyes and tell them to think of the last time they felt really happy….When I ask people to raise their hand if they were with others in their memories, usually nine out of ten do so.”
-Gather with others.
This is a big one for me in the wintertime. Hosting little informal gatherings, seeing my family regularly, setting new traditions and celebrating special occasions are all so important for reinforcing a sense of community, and personally I love the level of anticipation they can give any given week.
A few weeks ago I hosted a small gathering of friends where each of them brought a different soup, then I made focaccia and a cheese plate. It was simple and cozy and I looked forward to it all week!
“Someone puts a hand on your shoulder, gives you a kiss, or caresses
your cheek and you instantly feel calm and happy. Our bodies work like
that: it is a wonderful thing. Touch releases the hormone oxytocin,
which makes us feel happy and reduces stress, fear, and pain.”
-Bake. I also learned through this book that Danish culture involves a lot of cake and sweets, a little indulgence! I've been baking A LOT this winter. It's something that can always pull me out of a funk, and the end result is sweet and warming. I love to bake for friends and special occasions as well, which plays into other hygge factors too. I shared some of my favorite recipes last week:
-Cut yourself some slack. While I am not against self-discipline or motivation, I don’t think winter is the time to really push that discipline, to test yourself or hold yourself up to a measure of productivity. Winter is meant for hibernation, and if that means being less productive and more focused on rhythms that will restore and keep you through this season, I am all for that.
“Hygge is charged with a strong orientation and commitment toward experience and savoring the present moment.”
-Finally, practice gratitude. I think Wiking said it best in his book, so I'll just share his words:
“Hygge is humble and slow. It is choosing rustic over new, simple over
posh and ambience over excitement. In many ways, hygge might be
the Danish cousin to slow and simple living...hygge is about giving
yourself and others a treat. It is about savoring the moment and the
simple pleasures of good food and good company….More than anything,
savoring is about gratitude. We often remind each other not to take
things for granted. Gratitude is more than just a simple ‘thank you’
when you receive a gift. It is about keeping in mind that you live right now,
allowing yourself to focus on the moment and appreciate the life you lead,
to focus on all that you do have, not what you don’t.”
More Inspiration:
This Week’s Little Joy: I think I officially actually look pregnant! I've waited a while for this, and now that I have a few maternity pieces in my wardrobe to help accommodate, I'm loving it. One such piece are these overalls from Target, they hit right at the bottom of my belly and scream "hey there's a whole baby here," which I love.
What I’m Listening To: This playlist on Spotify called "dreamy classical, romantic era," and that it is. Springtime is when I really get back into my classical roots, and this playlist is getting me in the mood for it! It's lovely to have on in the background as I go about my day.
Thank you so much for listening! Feel free to leave a comment, or head to Apple Podcasts to leave a star rating or review. If you have any suggestions for future episodes, send an email in the contact form on this site. I’d love to hear from you, and I'll be back in two weeks!